Why the RPDR Finale Had Us Screaming into the Trade Winds

We got the winner we wanted: Onya Nurve turned the party and snatched that crown like it owed her money. But while the confetti flew and the credits rolled, I was still side-eying one thing: how did Sam Star weasel her way into the Final 4?

Let’s not rewrite history — Susie Toot’s Audrey in Snatch Game was a disaster. Like, "feed me" never felt more like a threat. But even with that tragic impersonation, Susie had heart. She brought chaos, charm, and the kind of unpredictable, lovable energy that makes a Drag Race season fun. Meanwhile, Sam Star gave rehearsed pageant patter, tight looks with zero joy, and the emotional depth of a laminated business card.

Week after week, she coasted by on polish, and sure — the judges ate it up. But it was all so hollow. She never gave the audience her. And no matter how perfect her “Love the Skin You’re In” speech was (probably written weeks in advance), it never hit the way Susie’s spontaneous chaos did.

Onya Nurve takes the RPDR Season 17 crown!

So yes, Onya earned the crown. But Sam Star making Top 4 over real, raw queens like Susie? That’s the gag. The only justice will be served Monday at Wang Chung’s at Spring Queening trivia — where the judgments make sense and we stan realness.